It’s Sunday night at 6pm. My week is ending and beginning. I am worn down to a nub. I am fat and tired and my teeth hurt and my hair is greasy and my bangs just will not do a damn thing I ask them to do. I desperately need a pedicure, but I don’t even have the energy to pour myself a basin of hot water and submerge my feet. I haven’t shaved my legs in weeks. My eyebrows could use some help, too. I think that I might have ringworm on my hand. It’s not exactly a circle, but it looks weird. So I’m putting antifungal cream on it anyway, just in case. The cat has been acting odd all weekend, yowling at me for hours on end, then hiding under the couch. I hope he’s not sick, too. The therapist asked me to tell her who I am, and I froze. I don’t know. Tired? Hairy? Unkempt? Unmoored? Unhinged? I’m too tired to have a glass of wine. It’s bedtime. Let’s just sleep this day off, and work with whatever we wake up with tomorrow.
3 responses to “Looper”
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You’re tired. Plus, if you were at my end of the continent, yowling cats mean something invisible has been following you around. But I think everything should be okay once you get your energy level back together.
Drink lots of warm water, less wine. More rest. Pick self up when feeling better. Just wax everything off one time, then meni/pedi. If you can spare some time, go for oil body massage. It really helps put things in perspective.
And answering your therapist for you, “I am a beautiful, hardworking independent woman with 3 cats; and I sometimes need a break maybe because I try too hard”.
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You’re right – I need to sage my apartment, and me, too. Charlie was acting a little more sane today, but I was thinking back on it, and I’ve had two friends over this week, and both of them are highly sensitive and prone to being “followed.” I’m sure in my weakened state I looked like prime rib to anything looking to suck a little extra energy. And I think I might just copy and paste that statement to my therapist, too, lol 🙂
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Someone taught me to not wear all black as I attract these things easily. If all black will invite bad ones. So I have to have a shawl of other colour, or accessories. And yes, I agree about being prime rib because when you’re too tired (that wasted internal crazy sauce thing going) and aimless, it invites itself onto you. Like how when I’m in that state, while sitting outside the house smoking and gaming on the phone, the tabs on the android will have its own mind to flip, change apps or close.
*Dudu dudu dudu dudu*
Hello,
I’m Nova
I have no “personal brand.” I’m not a girl boss, I’m not an influencer, and I don’t aspire to be powerful, inspiring, or rich. I probably can’t teach you anything, and there’s a good chance that there’s nothing at all of interest or use to you here. This is just where I come to talk about the random bits and pieces that make up my quiet life as a sober woman in her 40s. I’m engaged to the love of my life, have six (yes, SIX) indoor pets, and spend a lot of time gardening and hunting for thrift treasures. I also study classical voice (I’m a lyric coloratura soprano) and am deeply interested in all things spiritual and paranormal. Right now I’m trying to recover from career burnout and even out my personal energy, but my eventual goal is to become a medium and shamanic healer, using music to remind humans of the things that actually matter: connection, community, and loving all living things as though they were our own children. I may or may not talk about all of these things here (and sometimes all at once). Welcome!
Compass & Quill 
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