I’m so tired of the holidays. Can’t wait til today is over. I don’t want presents; I just want to have a day or two alone, with no one to talk to, explain to, endeavor to please or placate. That’s not happening, though, so it’s time to put on my happy girl face and march out to hang out with The Man’s extended family for the rest of the day. Yes, I know I sound so Scrooge-like – sorry to all of you genuinely merry folks. Maybe next year will be different.
I’m over it. I’ve been over it since before Thanksgiving, but now, today, I’m really feeling the irritation start to build. I can’t wait for this holiday to be over and done with for another year. The stifling commercialism, the intense contests built up around gift giving, the constant jingle jangle of collection boxes, mixed with nauseatingly cheerful holiday tunes – I want it all to go away. I’m tired of getting pressured into spending a month’s worth of paychecks to buy people I don’t like presents they don’t want. Even worse, I’m tired of being surrounded by outspoken Christians, all about “keeping the Christ in Christmas!” (which I don’t mind AT ALL – it would be refreshing to see the commercialism fall to the wayside in favor of something more heartfelt) who are still much more concerned with gifts than godliness. As a practicing Pagan, I’d prefer to avoid the crazy excesses, and spend time celebrating by sharing the Yule Season with the people I love, maybe even get to burn a real Yule log and talk to each other about the year, our fears, our hopes, our wishes as we move into the next parts of our lives. Instead, I’m reminded that nobody gives a shit about each other anymore, and instead of making paper chains and laughing with my parents, I’ll be drinking to stay in a somewhat jolly mood at my in-laws house. I can’t do this again next year. Something has got to change.