Ugly Little

I wish I knew how to never feel jealousy. I know that it’s not very nice, and that it’s something to fight through. I know that you look stupid when you let jealousy get the best of you. I despise people who take their misgivings out dramatically on those they supposedly love. I did once…

Right Now

As of the moment, I’m failing at keeping this blog running. After years of writing relatively faithfully, sometimes multiple times a day, it’s odd to find myself having nearly run out of words. I tend to think that it’s a low-level case of writer’s block, brought on by emotional distress, coupled with exhaust from my…

Tidbits

I quit my second job on Friday night. I just couldn’t take a second more of their bullshit. Walked in, saw the customer service nightmare that awaited me (all entirely preventable drama created by the megalomaniacal, drug addicted owner) and decided that I needed to choose myself for once. So I walked out, and do…

Pieces

I’m working a lot lately. My life is all work and sleep. I don’t even cook at home anymore. There’s a cafeteria at my day job, and I eat lunch there. If I stay late enough into the evening, there’s dinner, too. I’ve lost 15 lbs. this year already from just not having any time…

Tongue Tired

I’ve been out of words for awhile now. The last time I wrote here, it was my intention to start blogging with intensity over at my new site, and reserve this site for journal posts. As it turns out, I haven’t been able to write on either site. I’ve been curiously devoid of words. I’d…

What I Read in 2017

For the past five years, I’ve been keeping track of every book that I read, with the goal of reading one book per week. The list is tracked in a tab at the top of this page, called “Reading List.” Every year, I’ve gotten closer to my goal, but I still didn’t quite make it…

Wish Wash

There’s this lump in my throat, and sometimes as I’m walking home from work, I just start to ugly sob for half a second. Then I swallow, and keep walking, feet slapping against pavement, happy songs on the radio to balance me out enough to keep me from sitting down and staying there. What is…

Me, Myself, I

Working on an idea, but I’m only 10% of the way there. So we’ll put down what we can, then work with it as new thoughts come. The idea is this: I do not know me. This isn’t to say that I have amnesia, or that I’ve been living under an assumed identity, without free…

Poisoned

This invisible monster, Draped ’round your shoulders, Leaching its poison into your mind, This thing – uneven scales Gnash together ever-so-lightly, (Your ears don’t work too well these days) You keep missing it. I did too, at first. But I hear it now, This invisible monster – The one that whispers, The one that tells…