Blank Pages

Blank Pages

It’s almost time for me to start a new chapter. Time to say goodbye to my coworkers, clean out my virtual desk, pass on my passwords and reroute my emails. Sure, I’ll be doing a little bit of work when I get back from Europe, as long as my boss hasn’t hired someone new by then. Today, she gave me the option of continuing on with part-time “administrative” (by which she meant “actual marketing”) duties at the same pay rate I’m at now. I gladly turned her down. Considering that I haven’t received a raise since 2008, while doing the job of three people and DEFINITELY not as a mere administrative assistant, I’m feeling so lucky to get this chance to finally move on with my life and my career. I’m so proud of myself for getting the guts to quit. I’m finally in a position where I have skill and knowledge in an in-depth field, and having someone call brand messaging, SEO and web analysis “administrative” just burns me to no end. I’ve worked so very hard to get here for the last nine years, and I deserve to work in an environment that helps me build a better life, rather than continually cutting me down. There’s more to it than that, really, so much more, but today this is where I’m at in considering my future.

Sure, I will probably be taking a step back. I might be really screwed in the finances department. But I’m 30, deeply unhappy with my career situation, and ready to get my shit together and move into a different plane of existence. This vacation is physical break with my current reality, and when I return, I don’t intend to live the same way anymore. I’ve reached out to a friend who has a lot of contacts in the non-profit community, and I’m sending over my resume today. I’m also going to get together with a dynamic artist friend who knows all about what’s going on in the arts community, to see if she has any ideas for me. I’m continually scouring job boards and looking at freelance writing opportunities; maybe this is just the kick in the ass that I need to give myself to put together a plan to market ME.

I’m going to think about it while I’m away, but not today or tomorrow or all weekend. I’ve got some homework to finish, some last-minute tasks to take care of at my job, some yoga to do, and tons and tons of packing duties. But first I’m going to do a little recreational reading. I deserve it. And hell, it’s not like I’m losing any money by taking a break to do what I want to do, for once.

Bon Voyage, old shitty life! Hello blank pages!

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